Juxtapose

Ever been at a point in your life where you're just so upset with yourself, you're sitting there, locked away from the world, tapping away at random notes of an old piano? When you thought you'd lost all sense of purpose and you forget for a moment, just for a moment, and then realize and think to yourself 'What the hell was I thinking?'. I'm in that moment.

I didn't lose purpose. I simply wasn't thinking of the new ones indulged on me. To date, it was the brashes thing I've ever had to conjure in my thoughts. I was terribly in the wrong having even had been deluded by myself. I'm sitting here, more frustrated at myself than I ever was, having been that foolish.

God, why not just jump off a bridge while I'm at it?

How? I didn't think I'd be this stupid. Sometimes wistful thinking can do more harm than anything else. I know I've broken several grounds today. The fact that I'm making it sound like I don't care anymore.

Sorry...

I don't think the keyboard will survive with me. Five minutes...

No, I didn't take that into consideration. Not when I was busy ranting about everything else. I thought I wasn't being selfish but no, far from it. It was a perfect display of irony. Of stupidity. I can't emphasize just how much but to say I'm really, really disappointed with myself.